false start

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the contrast is killing me. going from ultra independent, running around on another continent, to ultra dependent, stuck at home with nowhere to go. i could whine about this forever, but i hate whining and have done too much of it already since i've gotten back to the states.

i love the new show 'lost'. i also love mtv's 'laguna beach'. especially kristin, she's such a punk and reminds me of someone so it's really hilarious for me. and i love hearing them whine about stuff. the whole conception of paradise i think is being addressed by this show, whether the people that made it intended that or not. almost all those kids want to get out of that place, that situation. the ones that don't either want more(what they have isn't good enough) or try to appear like they don't have. growing up as one of those kids in that place with that much money is a notion of paradise for a lot of people i think, but the people who have it don't think so. the grass is always greener dilemma is the plague of mental health i think, and laguna beach makes me think of all that stuff. there's something about watching dumb dialogue and superficial crap that stimulates a lot of deep thinking. one of my favorite phrases, 'i simply know contentment', is the challenge of my life, and laguna beach, you help me face those demons.

i'm upset that the black arrow people still haven't followed through on their spawn camping patch as well as the handfull of new maps they've been teasing us with.

i'm also upset that dragonrealms is now fifteen bucks a month. i now wonder if i will ever play dragonrealms again. with games like world of warcraft coming out, that have the potential of great roleplay value and intricate skill and development systems, as well as a detailed and satisfying real grahpics system, as opposed to text, i think dragonrealms needs to re-evaluate their business approach. obviously they're dealing with a shrinking customer base, and have responded by upping the monthly cost. this upping of cost is why i cancelled my subscription and haven't played in months, on top of the few months that i was able to play in morocco. so two years without DR, and i come back and don't want to sign up — this is a bad sign for the company. and this price jack on top of the fact that the vast majority of developers for the game are volunteers. i would prefer a much slowed rate of releases(the rate not being very fast right now anyhow) and a price that reflected the fact that it's a text-based game. fifteen bucks a month for the basic subscription to a text-based game?!?!?! i'm guessing that world of warcraft is going to be less than that per month. if so, once i'm out and jobful, and in need of an online rpg community based game, i'll be turning that direction, and not back to the DR.

it's the end of a f/n' era, thanks to your jackass business approach, simutronics. thanks for ruining DR.

peace