In lieu of you: new chemises and camisoles to hold my waist just so. Love songs from 1947, 1960 and 1993. Songs excavated from the historical dig of my grandfather’s home. A waltz to dizzy me up. An IV drip of letters to an address that used to be yours. Abrasive mascara to draw out the tears; pastes and mousses to make up the flush. Books of shitty poems and plays I’ve dedicated to you. My messy bed; my heavy head.

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