The Devo cover band was good. Good, in cover-band terms meaning that it bared a resemblance, however slight, to the original. but I honestly couldn’t figure out why something like that would even exist in the first place. The Heart cover band was just as pointless, but their outfits were clearly higher-budget. The Joy Division cover band didn’t go on until around 1 a.m., and we stopped caring and left long before they even started.

We went to a place called the Beauty Bar. Just me and “the girls.” The walls were bink and glittery. I hate glitter, but I left because of the music. We got there just in time to hear a twerpy guy and a girl who looked like she was trying very hard to look like she doesn’t have rich folks try a hard-core rap act. It was painful, but the kids at the bar seemed to like it. Was I the only one who wasn’t getting it?

Austin was a pretty good trip, even if it was only one day. The band we drove from Dallas to see sort of sounded like the Kinks and was actually worthwhile. And it was good to be away from Dallas for a night. But the whole thing made me feel old. We were around a bunch of college kids who were very much into themselves. The way you look seemed to matter a lot. My friend Jenny introduced me to her friend Jenny, who looked me up and down, rolled her eyes, walked two steps ahead of me and stood there… facing away. Then she went to greet they two guys walking in who looked exactly like RUN-DMC in 1984. The glitter freaked me out and I was stone sober.

I had to face it. I am old. Too old for the Beauty Bar, at least. Lisa cracked a Milli Vanilli joke and I died laughing, but the kids stood around looking confused. Milli Va-wholli? Sickening, yes. But it was still the highlight of my night. The Beauty Bar was more of a hell than the hell-themed bar we had been to earlier, with Baron Munchausen playing on the screens. I wished the Baron would crash through the wall on his cannonball, grab me and take me back.

Tonight, I’m back in my home with my kid and my pets. I’m sure I’ll sleep pretty well with a refreshed sense of perspective. Knowing that I have a life with depth and purpose. That I’ve worked hard to have something to live for other than myself. That I’ve learned that there’s more important things than acceptance. And knowing that I really know who I am. And that makes me a lucky guy.

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