Even if I could hear what you said

I dodged a bullet yesterday. A figurative bullet, not a lead one.

I was on a plane from Salt Lake City to Vegas on my way home to Burbank. It was a long day for me, what with having to wake up at 5AM, flying to SLC, looking at real estate and cubicle furniture for seven (!) hours before having to hop on a flight home. I was exhausted. I was flying Southwest, where you get to pick your own seat. I take my seat next to the window and another guy takes the aisle seat, leaving the much appreciated middle seat clear. It began to look like no one would take the seat, guaranteeing my comfort for the next hour of my life, but the last guy on the plane decided to take it. Minor disappointment, but no big deal. Like I said, I was exhausted, and I passed out five minutes later.

I wake up some time later when the flight attendant tells me to put my seat in the full upright position. As I slowly regain my consciousness, I start to eavesdrop on the conversation of the two guys next to me, who seem to have been talking for the whole flight. The man on the aisle seat was describing his river rafting adventure company, which seemed to greatly excite the man in the middle. Soon after the pilot came on telling us to get ready for landing. And then the man in the middle changed his tone and asked, "So how do you feel about our lord savior Jesus Christ?"

So the Mormon sales pitch began. I quickly closed my eyes and faked sleeping to keep myself out of it. The main jist of his argument that most critics of the Book of Mormon haven't read it, and that if you actually read it, "it's clear that these are the words of the Lord." He started to really lay the guilt trip on the poor man in the aisle seat. I kind of felt bad for the guy. The man in the middle then pulled out the conveniently stashed Book of Mormon he had in his briefcase in case of emergency or chance of conversion. He then said my favorite line of the whole conversation: "Don't be like everyone else. Be a real man and read it!"

The man in the aisle and I get off the plane, and the man in the middle stayed on because this plane was his connecting flight. After we got out of the jet way I saw the aisle man quickly throw away his newly procured Book of Mormon. This was Vegas, and he had some sinning to do.