'twice as much'

my surviving set of grandparents are 92 years old and have an awful attitude about it. they always say things like, "growing old is such a terrible thing" and "it is horrible to be this old." i hate hearing them say it and wonder if it is so bad, would they be happier if they were not living anymore? i'm not trying to be impertinent, it's just something i honestly wonder. i have no call to judge, i mean maybe it does suck that bad to get old and sick and have so many people you know pass away and have it be hard to get around, and so on. but i can't imagine not seeing long and amazing lives like theirs as blessings.

my grandma is in the hospital, for problems with her leg. my dad, thankfully, is in michigan visiting and he carted her to the hospital when it got so painful that it was hard for her to walk. what's hard for me to accept is that there really isn't anything new they are doing to treat her; they ran a full battery of tests to ensure her pain wasn't caused by a new malady. when they determined it wasn't, they decided she would be discharged, and it doesn't seem like a whole lot has been done to really help her present condition.

the latest word i just got from mrs millican is that "the barium did not leave his stomach, threw it all back up. Rachael thinks surgery will be tomorrow." i don't know what to say or do. i think his dad will be flying out ASAP. please concentrate all your good vibes, blessings, prayers, or whatever else you believe in to our old pal.