my world is sufficiently rocked.

after thirteen years without a word exchanged, mike and i are talking again.

yes, that mike.

and it’s as if the world is turned upside down for me.  i’m still me, he’s still him, but we’re the grown-up versions – yet it doesn’t feel like that at all.  it’s like a time warp.  the things that were not good are better – so much better than i ever imagined they could be for him.  he’s like, this amazing grown-up version of the person i used to know, and used to love.

and i don’t know what any of this means.

thirteen fucking years.  we were children.  so how could there even be anything there now?  thirteen years ago i was a black-haired wannabe wild child with an attitude about everything and a fuckload of resentment for things i couldn’t name. i laugh at the me i was then.   so why does it feel like coming home to talk to the yin to my yang during those times, when i am not the yang i once thought i was?

i feel drunk, but have not had a drop to drink.    eeeeeek.

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