Life: Daddy, Library, Minivan Terrorists

This all makes me want to kick Richard Reid in the ballsack. No shoes, no water (no fucking beverage service on a lot of flights either, I might add!!!). Next, the terrorists will make exploding clothes (you heard it here first) and then we'll have to fly naked, because that's apparently how America rolls.

If I sound pissy, it's only because Amy's been pumping breastmilk ALL WEEK in Toronto. Yeah, this is going to work like a charm.

Terrorist douchebags.

August 9, 2006

If you ever think you ought to get a baby up in the middle of the night, chances are you should. I heard the little girl fidgeting in her crib around 2 this morning. She'd grunt and flop her legs around, then doze off for about three minutes. This went on for about 10-15 minutes. I fixed a bottle—knowing the tummy must be appeased should I rouse her—and went in. Her diaper felt quite full and I figured she was having trouble sleeping because of the wet diaper. Turns out the diaper was indeed full … of shit. Poor kid. I'm glad I went ahead and got ready and woke her; she'd only have gotten more and more agitated.

Yesterday I took Reed and Beks out to the library. Reed loves book (brag: he was reading independently at 2years, 9months!) so I've got Bek in the car seat stroller, Reed is holding one hand while "helping" to push with the other. Yesterday was also the primaries, and as such, the library was a voting location. As we strolled in, a candidate supporter with a sign said, "You're the first guy with kids I've seen all day! Everybody else has been women with strollers!"

Um. "Well, I'm a stay-at-home dad," I said. "It's what I do." That's me: trendsetter. Or the only guy who takes his kid to the library anymore.

Hmm. The rest of you guys are dicks.

At that moment, some small part of me felt I should have a minivan.

Later:

Speaking of minivans, I'm loathe to admit I felt my very first pang of minivan envy today. A woman with two children was exiting the grocery story as I went in. The kids hopped in, each with their own captains' chairs in the back, and she easily loaded all the groceries into the back. Shit. That's a lot of rolling space. I've got a full sized car, but for those of you without kids: car seats ain't made for cars. Wedging these huge hunks of plastic and padding into the back seat of a car is laughable … assuming you're not the one doing it. Upon trying to maneuver two of them in there, and having to shove my seat up a couple notches just to make everything work, I can see why so many families resort to the huge ass SUV or the minivan. Sadly, I also know that when the little girl outgrows the little car seat, she'll need to sit in the bigger car seat… facing backwards. Practically speaking, this is impossible in my car in this space/time continuum. Grr.